| Judging Books By Covers And Posts By Titles |
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| 05:41pm 14/07/2007 |
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Going back and reading a lot of my old Livejournals, I realized that my titles to some of them were sometimes more entertaining than the actual posts, so here, in chronological order, are the titles of every post I've ever done since January 2005...if you see a title you thought was particularly funny/witty, let me know and I'll repost the post it was attached too for all to see if it lived up to the title.
6th
9:20p Wow..The First Blog...be forewarned children
9:33p Friends..Who Has em?
8th
6:57p Aforementioned Entertainment and a Black Spot Of Guilt Upon Your Soul
9th
2:52p Work...Or Lack There Of
11th
6:06p Now Im Doing A Survey...Will This Techno Torture Never End?
12th
5:19p The Facts Of Life...Some Things To Think About
13th
10:30a More Fun Facts With Colin, And Some Good Advice
10:33p It's All About The Love
17th
5:47p Survey's Are Fun...No?...Yes -
18th
9:24p This Is The Truth...So Help me God
23rd
7:05p He Writes The Songs, He Writes The Soooongs...
25th
9:57p (no subject)
27th
10:14p ...And The Band Played On
28th
5:11p To Copy Scott Is To Grow
2nd
11:31p A Survey Of Fun And...More Fun
10th
9:35p For Everyone Who Thinks THEY Are Dumb.... - 2 replies
14th
9:39p Ob La Di Ob La Da... - 5 replies
17th
8:55p Don't Stop Me Now - 2 replies
27th
11:57a Random Coincedences Of A One Track Mind Lost In The Never Ending Spiral Of Lucid Dreams And Laughter
9:08p Hey Hey - 2 replies
28th
8:57p Alex...You Know Me all Too Well - 4 replies
4th
10:58p Now To Wax Philosophical - 2 replies
6th
10:58a Thanks Jack White...For The Fiberoptic Jesus You Gave Me - 4 replies
8th
11:18a How I'm Feelin'
10th
1:28p What did people know before Surveys?
4:37p (no subject) - 3 replies
13th
8:44p Fun Fun Fun - 3 replies
19th
8:24a Lyrically Musing And Waxing Poetic - 1 reply
7:25p More lyrics
20th
3:27p It's getting harder just to say the right things - 3 replies
26th
6:51p What A Rotten week
27th
10:48p Forgoing Abject Symbolism, Skirting Around An Issue Or Anything Like That, I Just Need To Say:
28th
1:03p Even More Lyrics
29th
8:25p Weird, But ok - 1 reply
3rd
10:14a Fun Times And Fast Crimes - 2 replies
6th
3:06p 39 Steps To Wisdom - 1 reply
10th
10:07a The Voice That Has Been Speaking For Me Is No Voice Of Mine - 1 reply
13th
3:26p Surveyatica - 2 replies
10:29p Now Is Time For Some Fun - 2 replies
17th
7:54p Survey About High school...cause you know we ALL want to remember that...
21st
10:18p w00t! Word. Weeerd. Yo. - 3 replies
24th
10:23a Oh Sungasses...
9:41p Survey Survey, Laughing Happy Survey
30th
9:36a Word Up Yo
1st
6:52p Just So you all Know - 1 reply
6th
2:21p Heres a fun idea
7th
9:35a Im Boooored
10th
10:24a Wow, A long Survey! - 2 replies
24th
3:10p Im now Reachable
25th
3:57p Yeah...a new song - 2 replies
31st
9:26a So Long And Thanks For All The Fish
1st
3:46p Star Whores
26th
9:44a He Who Makes A Beast Out Of HImself, Gets Rid Of The Pain Of Being A Man... - 1 reply
3:08p A Survey...and Two Posts in one Day.. I LIKES TA HAVE FUNZ!! - 7 replies
30th
10:52p Why Boys Don't Know The Blues... - 1 reply
18th
10:26p By Reading This Livejournal You Agree To The Terms Of Service Stated Herein - 6 replies
28th
9:17a (no subject)
29th
9:51p Bad Bad Day - 1 reply
29th
3:49p WOW A NEW ONE!!
5th
11:08a Accomplish Without Knowing Better (It's a long one) - 3 replies
18th
3:13p My Stats - 4 replies
26th
8:34p Destination...Anywhere But Here - 1 reply
2nd
7:28p Points To Ponder - 1 reply
3rd
5:43p Fun LIttle One Liners
6th
3:49p 9 Things I Hate About Everyone
9:53p A Survey To End All Surveys - 1 reply
9th
6:44p Hot New Joint
10th
5:23p Understanding In A Car Crash - 1 reply
12th
2:44p (no subject) - 4 replies
15th
8:40p A Killer Survey..its Random
16th
1:21p (no subject)
17th
4:36p Everything anyone could possibly want to know about me - 1 reply
19th
2:44p HAHAHAHA
28th
12:34p Matter of the heart?
4:30p Wow
3rd
2:57p An Epic Of Time Wasted - 11 replies
4th
2:24p Well Well Well - 6 replies
5th
9:42a Morning Tired Sleepy Work Me Ugh - 1 reply
14th
9:05a Time For More Randomness - 6 replies
9:20p My LJ Sitcom
18th
2:41p I Wish I Could Be The One, The One Who Won't Care At All
30th
10:18a Nobody Expects It When A Naked Person Attacks Them...
4:15p Two Entries In One Day...Awesome? Who knows, but I was bored... - 1 reply
1st
1:57p Another Damn Survey
4th
4:03p Saturday Night In Vancouver - 7 replies
5th
7:13p Oh So Scandalous
6th
7:05p Liquid Sweet Tarts And Jolt Cola - 3 replies
10th
10:28a And I Say Damn The Frozen Yogurt! - 5 replies
14th
5:53p Hardcore Bizznatches
25th
11:30a Happy Annual Gift Day Christmas Festive Season Channukah Kwanza Holiday
2nd
5:58p HAPPY BELATED NEW YEAR
12th
6:04p Something Fun And Random - 4 replies
23rd
8:47a WARNING:
1:57p The Aforementioned Rant!! - 14 replies
5th
10:44a Pseudo-Holiday Survey - 2 replies
8:45p Kiss Kissy Kiss Kiss Kiiisssss
5th
5:59p Hahaha, To Funny, Too True, Guilty of ALL of them..well..almost all - 1 reply
2nd
9:01p Open Call?! - 4 replies
23rd
11:28a Scratched Out, Strung Out, Drained And Happy - 1 reply
24th
4:51p Fun For A Lark - 1 reply
27th
7:18p Hahaha - 1 reply
30th
11:51a Egg Shizznit!
2nd
9:01p Open Call?! - 4 replies
23rd
11:28a Scratched Out, Strung Out, Drained And Happy - 1 reply
24th
4:51p Fun For A Lark - 1 reply
27th
7:18p Hahaha - 1 reply
30th
11:51a Egg Shizznit!
10th
7:48p Hey..I'm Hip!
18th
4:01p Oh Lordy - 1 reply
8th
8:48p There are two types of people in this world... - 2 replies
21st
8:39p Innocence Flatlined (A Poem..By Me!)
12th
8:35p Bored Bored Bored
9th
5:39p Powerthirst
4th
8:22p How To Play The Blues |
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| How To Play The Blues |
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| 08:22pm 04/07/2007 |
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mood:  uncomfortable
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How to Sing the Blues:
1. Most Blues begin, "Woke up this morning..."
2. "I got a good woman" is a bad way to begin the Blues, 'less you stick
something nasty in the next line like, "I got a good woman, with the meanest
face in town."
3. The Blues is simple. After you get the first line right, repeat it. Then
find something that rhymes...sort of: "Got a good woman with the meanest
face in town. Yes, I got a good woman with the meanest face in town. Got
teeth like Margaret Thatcher, and she weigh 500 pound."
4. The Blues is not about choice. You stuck in a ditch, you stuck in a ditch
- ain't no way out.
5. Blues cars: Chevys, Fords, Cadillacs and broken-down trucks. Blues don't
travel in Volvos, BMWs, or Sport-Utility Vehicles. Most Blues transportation
is a Greyhound bus or a southbound train. Jet aircraft an' state-sponsored
motor pools ain't even in the running. Walkin'
plays a major part in the blues lifestyle. So does fixin' to die.
6. Teenagers can't sing the Blues. They ain't fixin' to die yet. Adults sing
the Blues. In Blues, "adulthood" means being old enough to get the electric
chair if you shoot a man in Memphis.
7. Blues can take place in New York City but not in Hawaii or any place in
Canada. Hard times in Minneapolis or Seattle is probably just clinical
depression. Chicago, St. Louis, and Kansas City are still the best places to
have the Blues. You cannot have the blues in any place that don't get rain.
8. A man with male pattern baldness ain't the blues. A woman with male
pattern baldness is. Breaking your leg 'cause you skiing is not the blues.
Breaking your leg 'cause a alligator be chomping on it is.
9. You can't have no Blues in a office or a shopping mall. The
lighting is wrong. Go outside to the parking lot or sit by the dumpster.
10. Good places for the Blues:
a. highway
b. jailhouse
c. empty bed
d. bottom of a whiskey glass
Bad places:
a. Dillard's
b. gallery openings
c. Ivy League institutions
d. golf courses
11. No one will believe it's the Blues if you wear a suit, 'less you found
it and slept in it.
12. Do you have the right to sing the Blues? Yes, if:
a. you older than dirt
b. you blind
c. you shot a man in Memphis
d. you can't be satisfied
No, if:
a. you have all your teeth
b. you were once blind but now can see
c. the man in Memphis lived
d. you have a 401K or trust fund
13. Blues is not a matter of color. It's a matter of bad luck. Tiger Woods
cannot sing the blues. Sonny Liston could. Ugly white people also got a leg
up on the blues.
14. If you ask for water and your darlin' give you gasoline, it's the Blues.
Other acceptable Blues beverages are:
a. cheap wine
b. whiskey or bourbon
c. muddy water
d. nasty black coffee
The following are NOT Blues beverages:
a. Perrier
b. Chardonnay
c. Snapple
d. Slim Fast
15. If death occurs in a cheap motel or a shotgun shack, it's a Blues death.
Stabbed in the back by a jealous lover is another Blues way to die. So is
the electric chair, substance abuse, and dying lonely on a broken down cot.
You can't have a Blues death if you die during a tennis
match or getting liposuction.
16. Some Blues names for women:
a. Sadie
b. Big Mama
c. Bessie
d. Fat River Dumpling
17. Some Blues names for men:
a. Joe
b. Willie
c. Little Willie
d. Big Willie
18. Persons with names like Michelle, Amber, Debbie, and Heather can't sing
the Blues no matter how many men they shoot in Memphis.
19. Make your own Blues name Starter Kit:
a. name of physical infirmity (Blind, Cripple, Lame, etc.)
b. first name (see above) plus name of fruit (Lemon,Lime,Kiwi,etc.)
c. last name of President (Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, etc.)
For example, Blind Lime Jefferson, Jakeleg Lemon Johnson or Cripple Kiwi
Fillmore, etc. (Well, maybe not "Kiwi")
20. I don't care how tragic your life: if you own a computer, you can not
sing the blues. |
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| Bored Bored Bored |
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| 08:35pm 12/05/2007 |
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Choose a band/artist and answer only in song TITLES by that band: Against Me!
Are you male or female: Does It Make A Difference?
Describe yourself: Baby, I'm An Anarchist!
How do some people feel about you: Those Anarcho Punks Are Mysterious...
How do you feel about yourself: Even At Our Worst We're Still Better Than Most
Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend:: Unprotected Sex With Multiple Partners
Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend:: Jordan's 1st Choice
Describe where you want to be: Slurring The Rhythms
Describe what you want to be:: Tonight We're Gonna Give It 35%
Describe how you live:: Unsubstantiated Rumors Are Good Enough For Me (To Base My Life Upon)
Describe how you love:: Beginning in an Ending
Share a few words of wisdom: Pints Of Guinness Make You Strong |
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| Innocence Flatlined (A Poem..By Me!) |
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| 08:39pm 21/03/2007 |
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As the echoes long forgotten ricocheted around the hallowed ground of an abandoned movie theater
Our lives were changed forever, fiendishly useless and yet serving a purpose we could not discern
Like the blank page at the front of a Bible we were the promises of more and yet the veil of what really must be said
Some hadn't drank that night, instead choosing to drown in a cacophony of otherworldly sounds while the rest shook hands and drowned their sorrows
It had all gone wrong, we were all so frail, our faces the masks of starving creatures and heroin face lifts
No one tried to dance, the feeling was irrelevant and the music wouldn't breach the sound of our own inflated ego's popping
Life to this point had only been a facade, a candy coated nose dive in the ever obscured airways of personality
We were all sorry for what we had become, but were more sorry for what the others had not...
And I drowned, so perfect
Only to wake up again
Right where I started from
We won't stop, though tired
Nobody here understands
We're not who we once decided to be
The barometer dropped and the skies cracked open, raining down the truth on our heads like tears from a junkies eyes
This is not how everything was supposed to be, we were supposed to trim the veil back and view the truth
Instead we only managed to secure our eyes shut with the glue of broken promises and empty words
Those of us who could remember knew that the cocaine nose jobs and track marked histories were distorted and everything else was merely falsification
Why were they crying? The corpses ashes had long ago spread to the wind, we had nothing left to sift
A scourge burned across the face of the earth spoke volumes to the beliefs we all once had that were shattered simultaneously
No more could we take shelter in the candy coated armour of ignorance, our minds shielded by a desire to not know
No more could we rely on ourselves to breach the gap of the neutron edifice, we needed others help...
And I drowned, so perfect
Only to wake up again
Right where I started from
We won't stop, though tired
Nobody here understands
We're not who we once decided to be |
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| There are two types of people in this world... |
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| 08:48pm 08/11/2006 |
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mood:  blank music: Tra La La - Günther
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...Those who have seen From Dusk Till Dawn, and those who haven't...
Not that that has anything to do with anything!
OH MY GOD...Colin isn't dead! It's been like months since I bothered to post anything, and I find myself bored right now so I guess I'll do a rapid synopsis of my life...
AOIHFUIADIUJAIJSDH
Very Rapid..
(I don't like it...I don't like it at all...)
Anywho, for a more valid point, here is a somewhat more detailed account of what has happened before:
Baroness Prunella Dantrey, heiress to the Halibut millions, was jilted at the alter by Sir Arthur Rock Hampton, second cousin to King Louis the...Ex One Vee?...Jonathan Clagmire heard the news, but being in Switzerland he could do nothing and ended up embarassing his fiance Mary Greenslade. Infuriated by the slight, Mary Greenslade has sent word to her cousins Gladys Ellington and Max Geldray, who is also second in line for the Halibut millions...now read on!.
(...I don't like it...)
Ok, so I'm being weird, whatever...brief facts of what my life has been:
- Still with Britt, 6 months now
- Britts dad is a Manic Depressive Bi Polar Paranoid Delusional Obsessive Compulsive, he had a massive Manic Episode and assaulted her, she has moved out of the house and is currently living with me and my parents.
- In search of a house/townhouse to rent to live in as is a bit cramped here now
- Bandless..sigh
- Working at Genesis Electronic Recycling still, smashing computers and driving the truck to pick stuff up
- Was rear ended today in the company truck by an Asian man who didn't seem to understand that a right turn signal and brake lights = SLOW DOWN
- Annacis Island Sucks
- I've been listening to way to many 1950's radio comedy shows, it's warping my mind
- It's hard to find a place to rent that accepts pets
- Jesus built my Hot Rod
- I'm not going to see GWAR, which makes me sad
- I clearly don't understand the meaning of the word Brief
- Brief is another word for Underwear, I just had a very immature giggle
- Alex MacFarlane should lay off the Doritos.... I don't really mean that, I just don't think she even looks at Livejournal anymore, so if she notices this and comments then everyone will know she's still doing it!
- Scott eats babies
- I doubt anyone took the time to read every single one of these, and if they did it means their life is almost as boring as mine is right now.
- Big Ray Ivison played for the Whitecaps.
There, an update, you happy? I sure hope you are! |
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| Oh Lordy |
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| 04:01pm 18/07/2006 |
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I FELL IN LOVE WITH MY BROTHER BECAUSE THE VOICES TOLD ME TOO!!
>>This is just great and fun too....
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>>
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>>Return this to the person who sent it to you and put your picks in
>>the subject line.
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>>Pick the month (number) you were born in:
>>
>>
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>>1----I fell in love with
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>>2----I ate
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>>3----I smacked
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>>4----I sang to
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>>5----I gave my number to
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>>6----I murdered
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>>7----I shot
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>>8----I gave a lap dance to
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>>9----I choked on
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>>10---I bitched out
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>>11---I had sex with
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>>12---I humped
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>>
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>>Pick the day (number) you were born on:
>>
>>
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>>1-------A homeless guy
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>>2-------your mom
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>>3-------a banana
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>>4-------a fork
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>>5-------a Mexican
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>>6-------a gangster
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>>7-------a hooker
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>>8-------an ipod
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>>9-------my best friends boyfriend
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>>10-------a goat
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>>11-------my dog
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>>12-------a ninja
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>>13-------the computer
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>>14-------a football player
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>>15-------my neighbor
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>>16-------myself
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>>17-------a Jones soda
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>>18-------a llama
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>>19-------a pickle
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>>20-------a stuffed animal
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>>21-------a permanent marker
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>>22-------my dad
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>>23-------a condom
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>>24-------my psychiatrist
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>>25-------a policeman
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>>26-------my brother
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>>27-------my sister
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>>28-------a baseball bat
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>>29-------a DVD player
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>>30-------a paperclip
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>>31-------my cell phone
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>>Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
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>>White------Because I was high.
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>>Black-------Because I was drunk.
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>>Pink--------Because I'm NOT homosexual.
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>>Red---------Because the voices told me to.
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>>Blue--------Because I'm sexy and I do what I want
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>>Green------Because I hate myself.
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>>Purple------Because I'm naked.
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>>Gray--------Because that's how I roll.
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>>Yellow------Because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
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>>Orange----Because I hate my family.
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>>Other-------Because that's how I roll.
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>>Now put that in the subject line and send to all of your friends to
>>make them laugh too!!! |
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| Everyone, ok, like 4 people was doing it! |
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| 05:57pm 26/06/2006 |
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Leave your name and:
1. I'll respond with something random about you
2. I'll challenge you to try something
3. I'll pick a color that I associate with you
4. I'll tell you something I like about you
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of
7. I'll ask you something I've always wanted to ask you
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on yours |
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| 10:04pm 09/06/2006 |
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mood:  Happy, And Sad... music: Vermillion - SlipKnot
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I had an urge to do a survey
. Do you have a boyfriend/husband/wife? Girlfriend
2. What is their name? Brittney Polichek
3. Where did you meet? Randomly in White Rock
4. When did you meet? Last Month
5. Do you remember what you were wearing when you first met? A7X Hoody, Vans Shirt, Jeans
6. Do you remember what they were wearing when you first met? Bad Religion T-Shirt, pants
7. Do you remember a song that was popular at the time you first met? Probably something Nickelback did
8. Do you have a special song? Vermillion by SlipKnot
9. Do you have a special movie? We Have a special DVD, "Clone High" the Series
10. What is the age gap between both of you? 1 Year 6 months
11. Do you like being older/younger? Don't really care, I like being older though
12. What is their birth date? July 1 1987.
13. Do you know where they were born? Canada!
14. Is he/she a zodiac sign that are you compatible with? I don't care about astrology really, so I dunno
15. Do they have annoying habits? Nothing so bad that I've actually noticed it, um... she bites...but I like that
16. Have you told them about their annoying habit(s)? I often inform her when she bites me that she is in fact biting me!
17. Do they snore? Silent as a rock when she's asleep
18. Do they hog the bed? Nah, though we usually just pass out in the middle of the bed, right next to each other
19. What are your similar interests? Music, comedy...she views the world the same way I do, almost spooky how much we have in common, she's like my evil and sexy clone
20. Do you have similar tastes in music? Hellz yeah, we were originally brought together by a mutual love of A7X, SlipKnot and other fine hard roxxxx acts!
21. Do you have kids? Shit No!!
22. Do you know what your partner is doing now? Showering before we go out
23. When did you last have a fight? When we get all worked up we get pretty rough with each other...but I don't think that counts as a fight
24. When did you last kiss? 10 minutes ago
25. When did you last hug? 10 minutes ago
26. What color are their eyes? Icy Blue
27. What color is their hair? Blonde and black, nice mix
28. What do you think their best asset(s) is/are, physically? Well she has 38D's....so I guess that counts? Also she's shorter than me and I like that
29. What is their worst asset, physically? her arms, they're short hahaha
30. Do you know their favorite song? Anything by the Misfits or Bad Religion
31. Do you know their favorite movie? FUBAR is in her top 3
32. Do you know their favorite book? Noooo Idea, does she read much?
33. Do you get along with their parents? No, not an issue...long story
34. Do you know what really annoys them? Not really no.
35. If yes, have you ever done it to annoy them? Not that I know of
36. What is the best thing they have ever done for you? Well, came over to see me today after I got back from Vernon to comfort me on my Grandmothers death...also brought me a blizzard when I had a sore throat!
37. Do you love them? In a way yes...never felt this way before, it COULD be love! |
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| Hahaha |
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| 07:18pm 27/04/2006 |
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What did people know before Internet Quizzes?
| You Are More Mild Than Wild | 
You're confident, and you really aren't concerned with how "hot" you are.
Other people's ideas of what's sexy don't concern you. And this is exactly what makes you attractive. |
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| Fun For A Lark |
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| 04:51pm 24/04/2006 |
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Directions:
Put your music player on shuffle.
Press forward for each question.
Use the song title as the answer to the question.
No cheating!
DON'T CHEAT!
How am I feeling today?
True Romance - Tiger Army
Will I get far in life?
Until We Fall In - AManda Marshall... I didnt know this was on my player ahah
How do my friends see me?
This Secret Ninja - AFI
When will I get Married?
Thoughtless - Korn
What's my theme song?
Thick And Thin - Avenged Sevenfold
What is the story of my life?
...But Home Is Nowhere - AFI
What am i like in bed?
Hold The Line - Toto
How can I get ahead in life?
Rock The Party - POD
What is my best feature?
Ooh Aah - Grits f/Toby Mac
How is today going to be?
Kids In America - Lagwagon
What is in store for this weekend?
The Defence - Bad Religion
What is my life like at the moment?
Doin' Time - Sublime
What song describes my secrets?
The Unforgiven - Metallica
What is my current lover like?
Get Busy - Sean Paul
What song will they play at my funeral?:
Those Anarcho Punks Are Mysterious - Against Me!
How Does The World See me?
This Celluloid Dream - AFI
Will I have a happy life?
Never Alone - Dropkick Murphys
What do my friends really think of me?
Biggest Killer In American History - Bad Religion
Do people secretly lust after me?
What Is Love? - Haddaway
What is my theme song while I walk down the street?
Take The Long Road And Walk It - The Music
What song plays while I sleep?
Lip Gloss And Black - Atreyu
What song plays when a cute boy/girl sees me?
Homophobes Are Just Pissed Cause They Can't Get Laid - Propaghandi
What is my amazing dance song?
Freak On A Leash - Korn
How do I relax?
New Noise - Refused
What plays when I get ready to go out on a hot date?
I Will Survive (Cover) - Snuff |
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| Scratched Out, Strung Out, Drained And Happy |
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| 11:28am 23/04/2006 |
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mood:  accomplished music: Matches - Scratched Out
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I Know It Ain't How It Used To Be
But Im Not Good At Being Me
Anymore...
So much to consider, so much to reflect upon.
A friend who I once trusted completely has been found out as someone who blabs my secrets to everyone.
Someon else who I dared to be vulnerable in front of has basically left me empty and shattered.
And yet, I am happier than I have been in a while.
Knowing that these people are not to be trusted, knowing what kind of lying, scheming, conniving, pieces of low down useless human garbage they are really takes a load off of my shoulders.
I honestly don't trust many people, force of habit really, I really wanted to trust people, I took a BIG risk, and it worked out about as well as you could expect it did.
Not to overly generalize, but people are NOT inherently good sometimes haha.
I don't trust many people, hell, I can count on one hand the number of people I trust, and now theres actually a couple vacancies, this fills me with a sense of new hope, because with them gone, I think I'm closer to reaching my goal of weeding out the useless trash in my life and utterly forgetting it.
The reason I'm so happy? Well it's mostly to do with the fact that I finally get it, I finally realize what I've been missing this last year, why I've been so different.
I used to always live for the funny, the happy, life was just a huge fucking joke and I was the only one who got it. I tried to find the good in everything, the humor in any situation.
Around the end of January that changed, people began to take advantage of me in extreme ways, began to make me out to be some bad guy on a quest to hurt all my friends because instead of lying and sugarcoating things I was just telling the truth.
Eventually I just stopped saying anything of meaning to anyone.
I've been without that spark, the humor, the laughter, I've been depriving myself of it, and why? Because I wanted to be accepted again.
Well no more!! Dammit, no more!!
What the hell is the point in fitting in when it's more fun to simply huck bricks at the large crowds, you have a better chance of hitting someone when it's a huge crowd and you're on the fringe. :)
Little late, but it's time to start again! |
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| Open Call?! |
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| 09:01pm 02/04/2006 |
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I haven't updated in a while....
Apparently my off colour jokes and rants are considered cool by people...
And my life is a fun little melodrama for all to see...
I have some damn good stuff to talk about...
BUT...
I'll only post whats been happening in my life if at least 2 people comment on this posting that they want to know...from now on I only cater to those who want it!
Huzzah! |
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| Hahaha, To Funny, Too True, Guilty of ALL of them..well..almost all |
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| 05:59pm 05/03/2006 |
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You know you're a 90's kid if...
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You can sing the rap to "The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air"
You remember when KURT COBAIN, Tu Pac, River Pheonix, and Selena died.
You know that "WHOA" comes from Joey from "Blossom" and that "How Rude!" comes from Stephanie from "Full House"
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early
on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school. (HOLY CRAP YES!)
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, wax off"
You have pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.
(see donnie darko...)
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
you danced to "wannabe" by the Spice Girls, Females: had a new motto, Males: got a whole lot gay-er. (so tell me what you want, what you really really want.)
You remember the craze then the banning of slap bracelets and slam books.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence...Not...
Where in the world is Carmen San Diego? was both a game and a TV game show.
You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green* Ranger were meant to be together.
*later to be white
"I've fallen and I can't get up"
You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates
Two words... Trapper Keeper.
You ever got injured on a Slip 'n' Slide
You wore socks over leggings scrunched down
"Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack, all dressed in black, black, black, with silver buttons, buttons, buttons, all down her back, back, back" SHE ASKED HER MOTHER MOTHER MOTHER FOR FIFTY CENTS CENTS CENTS TO SEE THE ELEPHANTS PHANTS PHANTS JUMP OVER THE FENCE THE FENCE THE FENCE
he jumped so high high high he touched the sky sky sky and he didnt come back back back til the forth of july ly ly he jumped so low ow ow he stubbed his toe toe toe and thats the end end end of the elephants show show show
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players
You remember New Kids on The Block when they were cool
You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By The Bell"
You played and or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet or Nano and brought it everywhere
You watched the original Care Bears, My Little Pony, and Ninja Turtles
Yikes pencils and erasers were the shit.
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.(pencils.notebooks.binders.etc.)
You remember when the new Beanie Babies were always sold out.
You used to wear those stick on earings, not only on your ears, but at the corners of your eyes.
You remember a time before the WB.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand" ... enough said
You thought Brain woud finally take over the world
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"
Repost this if you were a 90's kid and can relate to any of these |
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| Kiss Kissy Kiss Kiss Kiiisssss |
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| 08:45pm 05/02/2006 |
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mood: restless
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| You're a Freaky Kisser | 
When you kiss, you want to experience something new
A new technique, a new partner, a new piercing...
And your own personal kissing style is very unpredictable
There's no saying where your tongue or hands will go |
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| Pseudo-Holiday Survey |
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| 10:44am 05/02/2006 |
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mood:  cynical music: Maclean - Pleasant
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1. ARE YOU SINGLE, TAKEN, DATING?
Single, but then again its me so that could very well change 3 times by this afternoon
2. DO YOU HAVE A DATE FOR VALENTINE'S DAY?
Nope, hate to break tradition
3. IF SO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
Im doing NOTHING
4. IF NOT, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?
Scale Mount Everest
5. WITH WHO?
A Sherpa and anyone named Joe Mama
6. FAVORITE GIFT TO RECEIVE FOR VALENTINE'S DAY?
One time a girl in my class gave me a card that said "DROP DEAD" and an empty chocolate box...not exactly my favorite, just the only one I've ever gotten
7. ARE YOU DIFFERENT IN RELATIONSHIPS THEN YOU ARE IF YOUR SINGLE?
Yeah, when I'm single I tend to be a bit more sedated in public, you never know who's watching you
8. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF A GOOD VALENTINE'S DAY DATE?
I've spent every Valentines day with myself, and I must say I'm a bit of a prick!!
9. DO YOU LIKE VALENTINE'S DAY?
Hell No
10.WHAT MAKES YOU A GOOD CATCH?
I like to lead the line on a bit, but eventually Im reeled in and you end up feeling like you earned it haha
11. WHAT MAKES A GOOD CATCH?
Honesty is the best policy! Also a nicely toned ass and a pair of pretty eyes, all shallowness aside, someone who doesn't get scared off by the first sign of any real attachment.
12. WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU'RE ALONE ON VALENTINE'S DAY?
I beat my dick like it owes me money and watch Night At The Roxbury
13. HAVE YOU EVER BROKEN A HEART BEFORE?
I don't think I've ever broken a heart...if I have no one told me
14. HAVE YOU EVER GOTTEN YOUR HEART BROKEN?
Yup, it's like a sport for the females in my life.
15. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT YOUR Bf / Gf GOING OUT WITH THEIR FRIENDS WITHOUT YOU?
I'm normally all for it, but when you're just going out to get HIGH and drunk...kinda bugs me
16. HAVE YOU EVER GONE OUT WITH SOMEONE WHO YOU DIDN'T LIKE?
I went out with someone I thought I liked, but halfway through the date I was like "Um...I hate you!" (I thought that, didn't say it)
17. HOW LONG WAS YOUR SHORTEST RELATIONSHIP?
6 Days and 7 Nights....no honestly
18. WERE YOU EVER CHEATED ON?
Nope, relationships never last long enough for them to get bored enough to do that
19. HAVE YOU EVER HAD A RELATIONSHIP WHERE HE/SHE DIDN'T TRUST YOU?
No, apparently I'm very trustworthy
20. HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WAS GOING TO FAST?
Yeah, last one went by in a blur, I don't remember the details but my head still hurts.
21. WERE YOU EVER ALONE ON VALENTINE'S DAY?
I was supposed to be born on Valentines day, instead I was born early, I have been alone every single one since then
22. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH?
I DON'T DON'T HAVE A CRUSH
23. WHO is it?
Helga Mantooth Titsbottom
24. DO YOU WANT THEM TO BE YOUR Valentine?
They Don't exist, so that would be hard |
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| The Aforementioned Rant!! |
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| 01:57pm 23/01/2006 |
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(It's a Long'un...but please read it all!)
To anyone familiar with my rants you know I have certain "hot button" issues, most of which involve relationships and the stigmas surrounding them. Well I'd hate to disapoint my fans, so here's one more about my oft-referred to "Nice Guy/Asshole" theorem. Let me start by first saying that YES, I was dumped recently (last night), but I'm not really bitter about it, this rant has been rolling around in my head for a while and getting dumped just gave me an excuse to get it in to semi-understandable words and occaisionally lucid ideas. I'll try to stay to the point, but if I begin to ramble bear with me, I have a lot to say an no planned structure on how to say it.
Nice guys DON'T finish last, not always at least, but there are times when the race feels like you're way ro behind to ever catch up. I've mentioned before that I have too many "Just friends" girls in my life, and I do! And I realized that the best way to get a girl to be more than friends would be to not give her a chance to become my friend first. So I did, I asked out a girl I'd known for less than a week, and to my (And all my friends) surprise, she said yes.
So I said goodbye to the single life, had some fun, and enjoyed myself. It progressed really damn fast, especially since we only saw each other once a week or so. I did enjoy myself though, but in the back of my mind I had the constant haunting thought, the annoying fear that it wasn't going to last, because anytime I'm happy in a relationship, it ends...I think because it has been decreed that it must apparently?
That may be the reason why I was totally unfazed by it when it did end, so much so that I was more relieved that it didn't end badly than sad that it was over. Apparently seeing each other once a week is not enough and she simply has no time to see me because of school and work, not to mention that any real free time she has she prefers to spend with her friends getting stoned (Yeah, I sure can pick'em eh?)
So the conversation was pretty much the standard one I've heard to many times to count. "I don't want to hurt you, but I have to do this!!"
...Meh...by the time I finished reading the first half of that message (she dumped me over MSN, Smooth eh?) I was already dialing my friend to hang out, alcohol was in order.
So she gave me the spiel about not having any time, then dropped the two lines that EVERY girl has said to me EVERYTIME.
"You're such a nice guy, and girl would be lucky to have you.."
And my personal favorite if you know me:
"I hope we can still be friends."
That, basically, was that. Sorry for the extra long INTRO, I just needed to put this in perspective before I actually begin my main rant, a rant I like to call:
"OF NICE AND MEN" (Horns..Fanfare..Flashy banner?)
Why is it that girls always say "you're such a nice guy, any girl would be lucky to have you"? Cause from what I can tell, girls don't WANT to be lucky, or particularly happy for the most part. Since they ALL tell me I'm awesome and so perfect...then dump me.
Is it weird that I literally feel NOTHING anymore? Whenever I'm dumped it's nothing...just another day, only slightly more emo than usual. I don't think I'm that empty as a person, I just refuse to care.
Girls aren't that confusing in the long run, they just always want exactly what they don't have, and are generally disatisfied with whatever they do have. They all say they want a Nice guy, someone who will treat them right, who they can be with for a long time. That's what they SAY, but for the most part they are thinking "I want a bad boy!! Someone who drinks, smokes, swears, is rebellious and a completel asshole and jerk, cause that's HOT and it turns me on!"
Girls want guys who seem in control of their lives, and Assholes and jerks just kinda project that aura. When you're constantly insulting, berating and pushing around everyone in your life, it gives you a false sense of power, which boosts your confidence, which makes you appear more in control, which attracts the aforementioned women-folk.
Though most guys, Nice and Jerks alike, know that the aura of control around a jerk is as superficial as the women he dates, and eventually it collapses in on itself. Which causes one of two things to happen. One: The Asshole kinda snaps out of being an asshole and becomes a generally decent guy. Or Two: The jerk attempts to regain control by being aggressive again, but it isn't as easy, so they have to be MORE aggressive, and they go straight to being ABUSIVE, to everyone in their lives, especially their women.
And the girl says shit like "He's so dangerous and mean sometimes, but it's cool because he doesn't actually hurt me like he threatens too, I just love him so much I could never leave!"
You gotta love those relationships, going out with a guy who constantly acts like he wants to choke you out and beat you, but he doesn't, and because he DOESN'T this qualifies him for sainthood for some reason!!
So I thought up a cool way to meet girls, I'm gonna walk around with a huge knife or bat wherever I go, and whenever I see a pretty girl I'm gonna run up to her, scream and act like I'm gonna hit her, then stop, drop the weapon, tilt my head and smile sweetly. I shall repeat this process until one of the girls, overcome with emotion for such a large asshole and jerk, thrusts herself at me wanting to have sex.
Hey...it makes as much sense as anything else in my life!!
***The views expressed in this rant are mine, if you have a problem with anything I said..well...leave a comment, but make it an informed one.. "HAHAH U R TEH GAY" is not an informed comment.*** |
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subtleypsycho's journal
